Sunday, 28 February 2010

Stealing things. Sundaywise.

Sunday Stealing: Harriet's Choice: The Disney Meme

1. Which non-Disney Princess Disney Film is your favorite?
Oh golly. I'm going to have so much trouble with this meme. I'm a WHORE for Disney. Hrm. Nonprincesswise, I desperately love Mary Poppins, Nightmare Before Christmas, the old and new versions of Alice, Pollyanna, the Parent Trap, Sword in the Stone, Jungle Book, Bedknobs & Broomsticks, 101 Dalmatians, Lion King, Peter Pan, Finding Nemo, Freaky Friday, Pete's Dragon, The Fox & The Hound, Hunchback of Notre Dame, all the Toy Storys, all the Pirates of the Caribbean ones... I could go on.

2. Which Disney film makes you cry the most?
The Fox & The Hound. I can't watch it anymore. No good will come of it.

3. Which Disney film makes you the happiest?

4. Which Disney film has the best music?
GAH!!!! No, I can't choose. Disney music makes me so happy. They've had some of the best songwriters in the universe working for them. How about my answer is: Anything Randy Newman didn't have a hand in.

5. Which Disney film has the best love story?
Enchanted. But not the main one. Edward & Princess Nancy FTMFW. Princess Elphaba.;) And Maureen O'Hara & Brian Keith in The Parent Trap.

6. Who is your favorite Disney Princess?
PRINCESS NANCY. :DDDD But of the Princess marketing line, Ariel.

7. Who is your favorite Disney Prince?
The Beast, before he was a stupid poncey prince. I really liked Naveen in The Princess & The Frog when he was being a froggy. And Edward in Enchanted cracks me the fuck up. The rest are just pretty much lame blank slates.

8. Who is your favorite Disney animal sidekick?
Zero, Cheshire Cat, the one-legged pigeon in Enchanted, the Siamese Cats, Lucifer, Tito from Oliver & Company, Timothy mouse.... *sigh* Again, I could go on forever.

9. Who is your favorite Disney main character animal?
Hm.... Duchess, maybe.

10. Who is your favorite villain?
Captain Hook. I would HIT THAT. But lately I identify more & more with the Queen from Snow White. Damn kids, get off mah lawn & stop being fairer than me.

11. What is your favorite Disney song?
There is no possible way to choose this. Ever. Not even with a gun to my head.

12. What is your favorite Disney villian song?
I get way into Poor Unfortunate Souls from Little Mermaid. ;)

13. What is your favorite Disney animal song?
Everybody Wants To Be A Cat. 'Cause a cat's the only cat who knooooows where it's at.

14. What is your favorite Disney Princess song?
Maybe the Happy Working Song from Enchanted. It's just SO FUCKING FUNNY.

15. What is your favorite Disney Prince song?
One Jump Ahead from Aladdin.

16. What is your favorite Disney Prince/Princess duet song?
Once Upon A Dream from Sleeping Beauty, definitely.

17. What is your favorite Disney love song?
Oh golly... would Candle On The Water count as a love song? Once Upon A Dream, A Whole New World, Somewhere Out There... SO MANY. I don't know. Spoiled for choice.

Edited.... can I just rage for a second here? I can't even read other people's answers to this. I have to take some valium now. Shrek, Thumbelina? NOT DISNEY. Tinkerbell? NOT AN ANIMAL SIDEKICK. OMG I have to stop reading these. Seriously people. Pay attention.

Friday, 26 February 2010

Friday Fill-Ins (including a not-so-veiled hint to my husband)

1. A cup of tea would be so so so amazing now. My new eucalyptus mint. Please? I have a migraine and don't want to get up to make it. And I really need to take my painkillers and have nothing to drink. I love you.
2. A lovely amount of clutter makes a place feel like home.
3. Everything has its beauty except for Jennifer Love-Hewitt.
4. Why does your mom possess the taste of strawberries?
5. Art makes me weepy, gooey, angry, ecstatic, blue, need, hate, rapturous, sad, feel.
6. LOL I just noticed I forgot to give your mom her edible strawberry panties back.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to EEEE SEASON 2 OF TRUE BLOOD STARTING OVER HERE, tomorrow my plans include having cramps and a migraine and eating lots of chocolate and being a big old weepy stereotype and Sunday, I want to watch some EastEnders and veg out!


Thank you, sweetie. <3


Roughly 12 hours after I saw Alice In Wonderland, I realized exactly why it was so good. It took me that long to realize that not ONCE during the movie or for that entire 12 hours afterwards, I didn't ever think "Oh, hey, that was a really cool effect!" or "WOW, that animation really was spectacular!"

Never. I completely, 100% accepted the world that Tim Burton showed me. Wonderland happened. He didn't make it, he presented it as it was, and I saw it and accepted it. And THAT is why it was an amazing movie.

And now for something completely different.

How bad is it, on a scale of 1 to never-speaking-to-me-again, that I vastly and genuinely prefer the Lindsay Lohan version of Edge of Seventeen to Stevie Nicks's original?

Oh, yeah...

The heater stopped working again.
Good work, cuntburglar.

Drink Me.

Sooooo, sorry if you're coming off my twitter, this is pretty much what I've been saying all night since I got home, just all repeated in one place.

That said....


 [adopt me? please?]

Tim Burton does Wonderland. If you like the sound of that, you're gonna love the movie. There aren't any surprises, really; it does what it says on the tin. But it does it beautifully, and with such style & humor & poetry (literally, in the Jabberwocky sense) & Burtonian grace.... yeah. It was perfect. The 3-D was amazing, we were smack in the center front and it was engulfing.

It was what they called a "regional premiere," so before the movie started they streamed footage of the big Royal premiere in London, with all the fancy people arriving on the green carpet. Johnny Depp looks like such a lovely guy, he was standing in the rain for hours signing EVERY single photo, post-it-note, autograph book, magazine, boob, whatever, that was shoved at him. Everyone else did a few or didn't do any, did their interviews, and tried to get out of the (pretty much torrential) rain as soon as possible, but he was back in the trenches being sweet and humble and FUCKING BEAUTIFUL until the very last second. Seriously, how does that man do it? Better and better every day.

 [see that? he is secksing me with his eyes. he loves me and wants to have like, ten thousand of my babies.]

They showed Charles & Camilla (*gag*) greeting the cinema execs, the Disney execs, and the cast. It was really lovely, Tim Burton & Helena Bonham-Carter's 2 little (adorable and wonderfully dressed) boys gave Camilla flowers & it was precious.

And then, yeah. The movie. I'll try not to give away too much even though you already know the story. (I hope. If not.... go away. Forever.) It's updated, in the sense of Alice is 19 and is going back, and there are elements of both of the Wonderland books, and all.....

I spend most of my life in a state of spiritual-5-year-old-ness, so I just sat there with HUGE EYES, completely enthralled, swatting at rocking-horse-flies and shrieking at the ZOMG SCARY jubjub bird and giggling like a maniac and saying lines of poems along with the Mad Hatter under my breath.... OMG Barbara Windsor dormouse.


HEEEE!!! Tiny, feisty, rodent Peggy Mitchell FTMFW!!! And the loverly mad March Hare and the neurotic little White Rabbit and the Queens (oh god, can I just BE Helena Bonham-Carter, please? Forever? She has my same birthday, it seems like it could work) and the Tweedles and my darling hookah-smoking caterpillar and CRISPIN HELLION GLOVER, FFS!!!!! (He didn't dance, though. Disappointing.) And I can't praise Johnny Depp's performance enough. Really. There aren't enough words. Literally. The necessary words don't exist, and I'm not as good at inventing them as Lewis Carroll was. Hattastic. See? That's no good. And Stephen Fry as the Cheshire Cat? AMAZING. He didn't just phone it in and do a Stephen-Fry-voicing-over-an-animated-character, no, no. Our Stephen is too classy for that shit. He played the Cheshire Cat. With his talking. It was beautiful. And the girl that plays Alice is really lovely. Just a beautiful little creature. Kind of like Claire Danes and Kirsten Dunst had a baby that was somehow not weird looking like either of her mothers. I'd wager she's got rather an interesting future ahead of her.

OMG OMG OMG, yes, so, at one point during the pre-game, as 'twere, there was a shot of Alan Rickman having an intense conversation with Christopher Lee (probably the oldest man I would pounce) AND THEY WERE NOT MIKED. That is some sort of crime. I would give anything to have been privy to that conversation. I don't even care what they were saying. Those VOICES. The two most amazing voices in the world right now, and possibly EVER. Just.... chatting away. I was making grabby hands at the screen.

And when the Prince was doing his hand-shaking stuff, nobody was miked up either, so you couldn't hear a damn thing, except when he was chatting to Christopher Lee. Sir Chris laughed and you could hear it, from some far-off microphone. That booming, beautiful, deep laugh. I clutched at my Wicker Man pendant and nearly swooned.

Then we got home and I cuddled up with my plush Cheshire Cat to watch the ice skating, but my kitty decided that Ches was HERS and she pounced him like I would pounce Sir Christopher, and humped the life out of the poor thing.


Is he smiling or grimacing?

Aaaaand, she's spent. If only there was such a thing as kitty-cigarettes.

So, in short, Tim Burton retains his god status.


Thursday, 25 February 2010

Goin' To Wonderland, BRB. Plus BPAL & Sweet Libertine.

I am so stupidly excited today, it's entirely unreasonable.

My husband scored us free tickets to a "regional premiere" of Alice in Wonderland tonight!!!!! AAAAHHHH!!!!!

So.... yeah. I'm just buzzing completely!!!!! I keep making random little squeaks and bounces.

I've got on all sorts of Tim Burton stripes and look very pretty indeed for all the royalty of Wonderland. Playboy Mommy and Karma have always been 2 of my very favorite Sweet Libertine colors to put together. I'm not.... you know... real big on the subtle.

[If she's a lady, I'm a vermicious knid.]

Plus, as it's in 3-D (though not red/blue, obviously) the combo made me giggle.

And also today I have put on (interestingly not Cheshire Cat, too obvious) BPAL's Oneiroi. I'm reading Sandman and it seemed right and good today.

Created to invoke the ancient Greek deities of dreams. On the shores of the ocean, somewhere in the West, they dwell behind their gates of horn and ivory. Soporific, dark and unfathomable: a somnambular blend of deep lavender, white sandalwood, jasmine, bergamot and mugwort.

I get *nothing* of the ingredients they list, weirdly. It's almost entirely ylang-ylang on me, with maybe a little bit of lavender far, far underneath as it dries, if you use your imagination. I love it. It's just not what I expected, reading about it. :D That silly Dream, always fuckin' with ya.

And now I am watching Willy Wonka (again, the Tim Burton one would be too obvious, so the original) and singing with the Oompa Loompas and trying not to explode with excitement.

 [It never bothered me.]

Also it is payday so I get to eat McDonald's while we're out!!!! EEEE!!!!

I'm a cheap date.

Half-Nekkid Artsy Fartsy.

With deepest apologies to the masterful William Blake. Sorry, Bill. It was 3 in the morning and the ice dancing was bloody boring.

If you haven't noticed already, I favor unmentionables that say things. If I must wear them, they may as well be interesting.

Also, this is my first go at doing a "scheduled-in-advance" post. I'm a little wary. If this posts at any point between now (3 AM on a Monday) and when it's supposed to (3 AM on a Thursday), I might throw things.

Tuesday, 23 February 2010

Blogger Fail.

The Blogger is a lie.

Ironically, I got this fail-message when I came over here to unfollow someone.

Monday, 22 February 2010

Christian Side-Face-Hugger

I am knitting a facehugger. I win at life. She only has half her legs at the moment, and they're not sewn on yet. She can only Christian side-face-hug.

Sunday, 21 February 2010

Sunday Stealing

Ohhhh, I see, this is why last week's only asked about two seasons. Durrr.

Sunday Stealing: The Clown's Meme 2

34. What do you like about the summer?
My freckles go CRAZY and I look like I have an awesome, freaky skin disease of FRECKLE MANIA.

35. What do you like about spring?
The sun coming back.

36. How many states/provinces have you lived in?
4 states, 1 county in England.

37. What cities/towns have you lived in?
Wow, yeah, that would take way too long.

38. Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet?
Bare feet as much as humanly possible.

39. Are you a social person?
No, no, no, no, no. I bloody HATE people.

40. What was the last thing you ate?
2 mini Reese's cups.

41. What is your favorite restaurant?

42. What is your favorite ice cream?
Baskin Robbins rainbow sherbet with rainbow sprinkles.

43. What is your favorite dessert?
At risk of sounding really vain, I make the best cherry pie in the entire universe. The fuckpie, though mine, and partially cherry, is NOT to proper specifications, as the correct ingredients don't exist in stupid, stupid England.

44. What is your favorite kind of soup?
Tom Kha Gai.

45. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich?
Smucker's grape jelly, which you can't get in England either. They don't even have jelly. They have jam and jelly means jell-o.

46. Do you like Chinese food?
Very much so.

47. Do you like coffee?
Very much so.

48. How many glasses of water, a day, do you drink on average?
Not near enough. A couple-few.

49. What do you drink in the morning?
What, like first thing? I take ridiculous amounts of pills with water.

50. What non-banking related card in your wallet is the most valuable to you?
My Elvira Fan Club membership card.

51. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?
The left, as you're lying on your back.

52. Do you know how to play poker?
Christ, no. I'm hopeless.

53. Do you like to cuddle?
More than almost anything. I'm SUPER cuddly.

54. Have you ever been to Canada?
Many times.

55. Do you have an addictive personality?

56. Do you eat out or at home more often?
We're broke as shit, we hardly ever eat out.

57. What do you miss about highschool, if anything?
HAHAHAAAAHAAAAAAA!!!!! Fuck your mother.

58. Do you know anyone with the same birthday as you?
Not personally. There's some awesome celebrities that are my birthday twins, though. Peter Cushing, Pam Grier, John Wayne, Helena Bonham-Carter.

59. Do you want kids?
More desperately than anything in the universe. I hate this question. Why do my insides have to be a roiling, Lovecraftian mass of endometriosis?

60. Do you speak any other languages?
I'm rather adept at Pig Latin.

61. Have you ever gotten stitches?
Yep. Only once, accident-wise. The rest post-surgery type stuff.

62. Have you ever ridden in an ambulance?
Yeah. That was kinda cool.

63. Do you prefer an ocean or a pool?
Being as I am a mermaid, I need a certain amount of ocean in my life, or I will be a sad panda. But I'll take a pool. I get to swim so rarely, I'd swim in a drainage ditch at this point.

64. Do you prefer a window seat or an aisle seat?

65. Do you know how to drive stick?
Your mom drove stick last night. No. I can't drive anything. I even suck at Mario Kart.

66. What is your favorite thing to spend money on?
Makeup and perfume and entirely frivolous things I don't need.

Friday, 19 February 2010

But Lancelot mused a little space...


LADY OF SHALOTT YARN!!!!!!!! AHMAHGAH!!!!! There was a very real possibilty of hyperventilation when I saw I'd won.

That is my favorite poem of all time and the colors of this yarn are based on the Hunt painting of her which is BEAUTIFUL AND MAGICAL (this is a summa cum laude art history major talking, SO YOU HAVE TO AGREE WITH ME)


I seem to have come over all Anne Shirley.

 (that is the face I make when I read Tennyson, too)


Oh golly.
I'm so happy.

Thursday, 18 February 2010

And now to make you all feel dirty for looking at me naked in the last post.


Already disapproving of the plans my parents had for me throughout the rest of my childhood.

That last one? One time when my dad was doing that, I puked in his mouth. Of course that was just last year.

No. I'm lying. Sorry. But I did totally hurl into his mouth when he was baby-flying me once. I win.

Half-Nekkid Theme Week, you say??


Winter Olympics? Theme week?


What the hell.

Wednesday, 17 February 2010

You absolute fucker.

Don't you dare talk to me like I'm a stupid little woman, you asshole electrician.
I know the heater "only works at night," I know how the storage heaters in my own fucking house work, you condescending fuck.
Just for that, your buttcrack is going on the internet.

Fuck you, you absolute CUNT. Don't you dare condescend to me, would you pull that shit if my husband was here? Oh, wait, no, you'd ONLY address him and ignore me completely. I fucking hate you and all your ilk. Walking out when you fix it like I wasted your time because "it seems to be working now." Yeah, you twat, because you have the tools to take off the cover and get to the inside fuses. Fuck you, fuck your sister, fuck your mother, fuck your grandmother. I almost hope it stops working again so I have to drag your condescending, sexist fuckhead back here.